Last year this time, I was frustrated, hopeful, disappointed, cautiously optimistic... basically a bunch of mixed feelings. Last year today (7/13), I started my stims! My babies completed 1 year on 7/9 as per their gestational age. I had an emotional outburst on that day thinking of where we were last year and where we are today... what all we had to go through to get to where we have! I can't be thankful enough for the two beautiful children we have been blessed with!
That brings me to the question of our embabies. We were fortunate enough to be able to freeze a few of our embryos... we have 5 embabies! Today, I am faced with the question of what do we do with our potential +5? Of course I have no plans of being a reality star! We (DH and I) had discussed this in the past and both were pretty sure that we wanted to give them to science. But today when I look at it... I am unsure! Several things run through my mind!
First off... my babies are already 3+ months old. I feel like time is flying by too fast, these days will never come... and if we stop at two, I am never going to get to experience this ever again... which makes me want to go for a third child. Though the practical and rational side of me knows that we are a happy family of 4!
Recently, one of the IF sista that I follow, had a BFN at one of the best clinics in the country. From what I know of her (through her blog), I know that we have similar backgrounds... a thought ran through my mind. What if I donated our embabies to them. I know it is easier said than done (legally and practically)... of course I never really proposed this to her, but I brought this hypothetical situation up with DH and he was not really comfortable. I am not comfortable blindly donating the embabies for adoption, because all my life I will wonder how the babies are doing, what they look like etc. But, looking at this IF world my heart just sinks to donate the embabies to science, where I know there are fellow IF'ers who have are still struggling to get to where I have reached. Though, I guess it is better to donate to science than just discard the embabies, because hopefully the science which has helped me reach where I have today, might be able to better help the next generation!
If you have frozen embabies, what decisions have you made?
That brings me to the question of our embabies. We were fortunate enough to be able to freeze a few of our embryos... we have 5 embabies! Today, I am faced with the question of what do we do with our potential +5? Of course I have no plans of being a reality star! We (DH and I) had discussed this in the past and both were pretty sure that we wanted to give them to science. But today when I look at it... I am unsure! Several things run through my mind!
First off... my babies are already 3+ months old. I feel like time is flying by too fast, these days will never come... and if we stop at two, I am never going to get to experience this ever again... which makes me want to go for a third child. Though the practical and rational side of me knows that we are a happy family of 4!
Recently, one of the IF sista that I follow, had a BFN at one of the best clinics in the country. From what I know of her (through her blog), I know that we have similar backgrounds... a thought ran through my mind. What if I donated our embabies to them. I know it is easier said than done (legally and practically)... of course I never really proposed this to her, but I brought this hypothetical situation up with DH and he was not really comfortable. I am not comfortable blindly donating the embabies for adoption, because all my life I will wonder how the babies are doing, what they look like etc. But, looking at this IF world my heart just sinks to donate the embabies to science, where I know there are fellow IF'ers who have are still struggling to get to where I have reached. Though, I guess it is better to donate to science than just discard the embabies, because hopefully the science which has helped me reach where I have today, might be able to better help the next generation!
If you have frozen embabies, what decisions have you made?
Okay, so I don't have any frozen embabies- but I know what we would have done, if we had any- there is one couple I know that we would donate them to. We discussed it at length before the IVF process, so I know my husband would be on board with that as well. I know it is easy for me to say now because I don't have any. However, right now I am trying to figure out the logistics of going through everything but the transfer (and PIO) again to be able to donate eggs to that couple. So I guess I feel strongly if I have no reservations about that, I would feel the same about frozen embryos.
ReplyDeleteHi BB, we don't have penguins at this round but I would definitely be inclined to donate them to other couples. I know Mike feels the same so that good. I think it's impossible to give advice on this matter as this is such a personal decision, but I think you and your husband need to be 100% on the same page before you decide on anything. Much love, Fran
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